When negative things happen in your life: someone does something to betray your trust, hurt your pride or your feelings, or cause you to become extremely angry, what can you do? When you find yourself caught up in a whirlwind of problems, defeats, and frustrations, what is the best way to handle them?
When difficult life issues arise, there are two things that you can do. You can either run from the issues; or you can do what is best—learn from them.
You can learn what to do. You can learn what not to do ever again. You can learn vital characteristics about yourself—weaknesses and strengths that you never knew you had. You can learn who is truly in your corner to support you, and who is only there for ulterior motives. You can use all of these lessons to improve your life and move closer to the physical, mental, and emotional place that you were designed to be.
There is no benefit in running from difficult life issues. The problem with running is simple. When you run, you are bound to eventually fall into the ditch of “remembrance replay”, putting so much focus on the past that it restricts you from moving forward. The longer you run, the longer you delay any progress towards your future. Even if you are fortunate enough to make some progress, your mind will still be stuck in the past, which will hinder you ever arriving to your full potential.
Successful people don’t let old thoughts crowd out the new ones from their mind.
When you work to find the lessons in situations, you gain an immense feeling of emotional freedom. You also develop strength and wisdom that can help you to be better prepared in case similar issues presents themselves again.
You may not be able to change any outcomes, and you may not be able to repair the emotions that occurred, but you can apply the lessons learned towards resolving the issues and getting them out of your system. That way, you can free yourself to go forward.
The pace of life is much too fast for us to dwell on the same things over and over. Trust me when I say that you are wasting valuable time when you allow that to happen. Whether your issues happened years ago or a moment ago, keep in mind that they are now still considered a part of the past. What’s done is done—now is the time to decide on a course of action for your emotional independence.
No more sulking. No more pity parties. No more running. Put all of that away and buckle down and map out a way through it. –You can do this! Running away from difficult life issues does not solve anything. Neither does staying present and trying to ignore them.
Go ahead—be brave and face it! Learn the key points that you need so that you can get to a happier state of being.
How do you normally deal with difficult issues? Do you find yourself running from them or otherwise ignoring them? What are some other things that you feel you can learn from dealing with your issues head-on? Share with me below or tell me about it at: firstname.lastname@example.org.
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Greetings Tia! You are very welcome! ~Thank you so much for sharing here with me!
Good stuff. Life’s difficult situations come like the seasons but if we know how to handle them it makes those situations more bearable. Great post! Well done!
Greetings: I truly believe that is the key–to always keep in mind that the joys and pains of life come and go in seasons, just like the weather. Also like the weather, some seasons are more difficult than others. You are right that it is so important to know the best way to handle them in order to get through them more smoothly.
~I really appreciate your kind words– thank you so much for commenting!
I try to divide difficult issues into two categories.
1. Things I can do something about. (An argument with a friend or family member, a problem with my students etc.) These, I try to take on and conquer as quickly as possible.
2. Things that are beyond my ability to resolve. (National political structures, friends who are dying…) These, I do my best to make peace with and not allow them to bother me.
Great post! Thanks for sharing the awesomeness!
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Greetings: I am glad that you brought up this very important point! There are many times in life when difficult issues arise that are beyond our abilities to resolve as you stated. It is so very important that we make that determination with the issue and do our best to still seek for the lesson to be learned from it. Maybe the lesson is simply a higher awareness, whether with ourselves our with others around us or society. It gives us peace and the ability to move on and not be bothered by it simply because we have the treasure of the lesson that we learned from it.
I truly appreciate your kind words! ~Thank you so very much for commenting!
I deal with my difficult issues by either pretending they don’t exsist or talking to a trusted someone about them, but usually I try to pretend they don’t exsist and hope they go away. If I faced my problems head-on, I think I could learn perseverance. Thanks for the great post!
Greetings: Perseverance is a very valuable gain when dealing with difficult issues head-on! And it is one that continues to grow the more that issues arise and are handled accordingly, whether it’s by talking to someone to get a different opinion, writing it all down or by thinking things through on your own. In any case, pretending difficult issues don’t exist is very similar to running from them. When you pretend, then you’re not being real and honest with yourself, with keeps the hold on you. Facing the issues as they come and finding the lessons in them breaks that hold and gives you true emotional freedom.
I am glad to know that this post was helpful to you! ~I appreciate your kind words and thank you so much for commenting!
It’s funny how the mind tends to focus on “negative” experiences from the past. When I notice my mind doing that I consciously focus it on what I want to experience in life.
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Greetings: Yes you are right–this is a very funny thing that the mind does, and it truly is a conscious battle to keep those negative thoughts from taking total control. I remember hearing a speaker say, “Ten people can tell you that they like the job you did on a project, and if one person tells you that they don’t, you will focus all of your thoughts, energy, and emotions on the one person instead of the ten.” –That statement spoke volumes to me, because when you think about it, it really is true. The same thing applies for past issues. We’ll put all of our focus on the negative experiences so much so that the memories of positive ones become faded. You are definitely right–we really must push ourselves to focus on what we want to experience going if we want to live the fullest life possible.
~Thank you so much for commenting–I truly appreciate it!
It’s funny because I was just reading about this! Learning from difficulties in our lives. Lessons are always there and we will definitely use them later in life! You did an awesome job on this post!
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Greetings: I totally agree: with every issue that occurs in life–especially the difficult ones–there is a valuable lesson. It is up to us to do what we can to learn the lesson(s) and carry them with us into our future. Not only can those lessons be applied to handling the issue if it happens again, but more importantly, they can be used to possibly prevent them from happening again altogether.
~Thank you so very much for commenting and for your kind words–I sincerely appreciate it!
Oooooh girl!! Makeba, this is powerful!! OMG!!!
You’re absolutely right too! It can certainly be hard to face the past; especially when there is so much hurt there. And most people worked so extremely hard to suppress what happened in the past; that the last thing they want to do is have to revisit it.
Yet, we must. In order to really get over whatever occurred in it, we have to face the fear of what might happen; and work to let go of anything that’s keeping us from moving to a more blessed future.
I know for myself, I thought that as long as I didn’t allow it to surface up in my daily thoughts, I was over it. That doesn’t work at all… because inwardly it was still there nagging and reminding me of what actually took place.
I think it was Oprah or Ivanla that said something like, “Forgiveness is letting go of the thought that the past could have worked out any differently than it did.”
That for me was the most liberating statement ever! “It”, whatever “it” was, happened just as it was meant to happen. This has been my lesson of late. Everything that has occurred in my life was another building block of creating the man I am today. Not all of it was pleasant, but it served it’s purpose… and for that I’m grateful.
LOVED this post! And I’m a HUGE Lion King fan, so I love that video as well! Great post, my friend. My apologies for the length of the comment… the post seemed to have gotten a reaction from me. ;-D
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Greetings: You made a very profound statement there–many times our way of dealing with difficult issues is the act of telling ourselves that we’re going to “put it behind us“. The funny thing about putting something ‘behind‘ you is that by doing so you have placed it in the absolute perfect position to take a firm grip on you to hold you back. That’s truly something, isn’t it? We don’t even realize what we are doing to ourselves by saying that–how powerful that one little statement really is.
No one can experience any true emotional freedom or growth by going that route. You hit the nail on the head: the only way to forgive something is to let it go, and to let it go you must process it–and part of the act of processing is learning the lessons that it held for you–to gain those building blocks that you are speaking of. It is certainly the best way to deal with difficult issues in life.
I am so glad to know that this post was powerful for you! I appreciate you kind words so much–Lion King is one of my favorite movies as well! And no need to apologize for any length of response: you know that your thoughts are always welcomed and valued here! ~Thank you so very much for commenting!
You are absolutely right! Ihave been avoiding and running from an issue for years. I like what you said, the pace of life of much too fast for us to dwell on the same things over and over. Life has been passing me by and I need to deal and resolve some things and move one.
You can’t grow staying in place. Thanks for this post.
Greetings: You are most welcome! And your words are very true indeed–there is no growth if you stay in the same place. The only way to grow is to break free from what’s holding you by resolving it, learning from it, and moving on. I am glad to know that this post was helpful for you and that you have decided to embark on your new journey of emotional freedom! ~Thank you so much for commenting!